Being Comfortable with Success

Have you ever noticed that you can sometimes end up with an empty feeling after a great success or victory? Don’t feel alone, as this is very common.

There are many harsh truths about success, and this is just one of them. We often work very hard to achieve a goal, and once we do, we are left with a feeling of now what! I believe that we live in one of the most demanding societies in the world and we are expected to win and achieve. This drives us to perform, and we tend to work longer and harder than just about any other culture. The proof is in the fact that the US ranks second worst for paid vacation days globally, after Micronesia. Note that this also applies to paid time off. The USA ranks second, only to Micronesia.

So, we have established that we work very hard in the USA and take very little time off. In addition, I would argue that we struggle to celebrate our successes. I will admit that it is hard for me, and I know that it is my role to drive celebration. The struggle for me is that even if I make a point of making celebration important, others rarely buy-in. They seem to have the attitude of, sure, we did great, but it’s time to get back to work. My feeling is that what people want most when they succeed is to get paid, but I would argue that even pay does not fill the void.

As we succeed, we also tend to find ourselves climbing the proverbial ladder. This means that we are elevating our position and our organization. As we do so and elevate above our peers, they begin to treat us differently. It is not uncommon that we no longer feel like one of the group because we are not.

As they say, the climb is always better than the view from the summit. I believe this and feel that we do not spend enough time enjoying the journey, but rather we try to survive it. Think about your job, parenting, or training for a marathon. All of these represent a level of pain and sacrifice, and we often do not take the time to enjoy it. Enough of the Debbie downer stuff. Success is not a bad thing, but it can sometimes feel that way.

I think that the best way to frame success is that we should embrace the fact that it may not make us popular, but was that really our goal? We must succeed in light of the negativity and the consequences that we may experience. It is simply a choice that we make, so the sooner we get comfortable with it, the better off we will be.